Skyway Robbery

I knew I was going to have to pay excess baggage and I wasn’t tremendously concerned.  Mercy Corps reimburses up to $1,000, so when I was sent to the sales counter to pay my fee I wasn’t fussed; until the lady behind the counter said 1,020 Jordanian Dinar . . . my jaw dropped to the floor and I said that is $2,000.  It’s $1,570.61, she corrected me as if that was going to make me feel better.  I refrained from asking her what she was smoking and if I also had to sign over my first born child, but instead handed over my credit card with resignation. 

20 Jordanian Dinar per kilo or $28 per kilo.  I’m writing this for any unsuspecting travelers that may be going to fly Emirates.  I asked everybody about it, very politely, I know you’re surprised and they were all very supportive of my outrage, but it was 20 JD per kilo.  Thank God, I wasn’t flying to Australia the charge for excess baggage that far is 50 JD or almost $100 a kilo. 

Even if I had gone on their web site to figure out my excess baggage I still would have had sticker shock.  It asks where you are flying from and to and then gives you the amount, but there was no final destination for Kenya; so when I put in Dubai my first destination it said 10 JD per kilo so I would have paid ½ the cost. 

I filled out a complaint form; tried to get my money’s worth by drinking a lot and then realized it would have been cheaper to upgrade to first class where you get 50 kilos of baggage allowance, I suppose diamond underwear weighs more than cotton, so of course allowances need to be made. 

In addition to charging me and arm and leg, the flight was late and then my second flight was delayed, although I would like to lay this at the Emirates door the airline was Ethopia.  I decided I had paid so much money I should get to use the lounge, but when I went to the special services lounge, it was deserted and for the business class lounge you had to pay more money no way.  Instead I sat down next to an electrical outlet, plugged in, got the internet and proceeded to e-mail every travel reporter I could find about this outrage.  After all, I didn’t want some more unsuspecting person to not be able to retire because they had flown on the Emirates.  And wouldn’t it be nice if I could cost them $1,570.61 or more in public relations? 

TRAVELER’S WARNING:  EMIRATES EXCESS BAGGAGE FEES EXCESSIVE REALLY EXCESSIVE.  SO EXCESSIVE YOU CAN FLY FIRST CLASS ON ALMOST ANY OTHER FLIGHT FOR THE COST.

I now stand firmly in objection to Dubai hosting the Olympics, because after all it is a Dubai airline and they would also have to host the Paralympics and all that extra equipment and luggage would increase the national debt of all countries fielding Paralympic teams or force all the athletes with disabilities to mortgage their houses. 

I’m oddly resigned to the fact that I will probably have to pay some of it out of my own pocket, but have decided the next time I fly Emirates to have excess baggage.  I’m going to take a duffle bag and fill it full of shit; then when they ask me to pay the excess baggage fee I will simply abandoned my bag.  Of course I can only do this if flying through Jordan, because if my bag gets checked it’s only the arrogant men at Queen Alia International Airport who deserve that.

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One Response to Skyway Robbery

  1. martine says:

    I wish you the best in Ethopia and hope your leg is OK.

    Love from your french family

    Martine

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